Suspense mystery “Mulholland Dr.” (2001) first comes across as an engaging story of a bright-eyed Hollywood newcomer (Naomi Watts) trying to help an amnesiac auto accident survivor. The obvious identity quest gets progressively more intriguing (or confusing), as strange, dream-like sequences are woven into the main story line. Although David Lynch received an Oscar nomination, it is apparent that the director follows too closely in his own footsteps, intertwining fantasy and reality in a way reminiscent of — and not as successful as — his critically acclaimed “Lost Highway” (1997). Still, it’s definitely worth seeing for its patently bizarre quality. Speaking of strange, check out the indie pseudo-noir thriller “American Perfekt” (1997) starring Robert Forster as a shrink on a cross-country drive, along with Amanda Plummer and Fairuza Balk as two hitchhiking sisters. Interesting and intense, the film misses the mark only slightly in that Forster is just not strong enough as a lead. In addition, the plot and execution are just a tad close to a couple of other, better financed films (“Kalifornia,” 1993, and “Switchback,” 1997).
On a lighter note, Dana Carvey is “The Master of Disguise” (2002) and is hilarious at that. This is an adorable, light family movie with great make-up and special effects, yet I often think Carvey’s humor is a little too sophisticated to have true mass market appeal — specifically in contrast to fellow Saturday Night Live (SNL) alumnus Mike Myers. Similarly, there is nothing particularly wrong with “Coyote Ugly” (2000), a tale of a New Jersey songwriter (Piper Perabo) trying to make it in the Big Bad Apple and paying her way by working at an outrageous bar. It’s your typical feel-good chick flick without any real meat to it, unless you consider the male appeal via the usual tits and ass and a couple of good songs by LeAnn Rimes. For a real look at Perabo’s acting ability (and a much more interesting script), rent Canadian “Lost and Delirious” (2001), a contemporary “coming of age” story of three girls struggling with life and sexuality at an all-girl boarding school. If looking for a true chick flick formula (read: sappy melodrama), take in “The Wedding Planner” (2001), where Jennifer Lopez gets to play an Italian Jenny from the block opposite the sugary-sensitive Matthew McConaughey. While formulaic, it’s well-written, aptly acted, and good for the soul.
“End of Days” (1999) is also quite good for the soul, but in a more literal way. This severely underrated thriller can be likened to “Stigmata” (1999) for its religiously apocalyptic plot and “damsel in distress” focus (and, perhaps, the casting of Gabriel Byrne in co-starring roles for both films). If you have an affinity for things that go bump in the night, you’ll like both, but beware of Arnold Schwarzenegger as the lead in “End of Days;” he isn’t overly convincing as either a disenchanted cop or the world’s savior. Another underrated thriller worthy of note is “Judas Kiss” (1998), a convoluted, film noir-styled kidnapping that goes astray, as usual. What’s unusual, however, is that this story isn’t as linear as, for instance, the similarly themed “Ransom” (1996). “Judas Kiss” is scary at times, highly erotic in others (I can no longer eat steak without thinking of Carla Gugino with a smile), and even surprising at the end. The problem here is overcasting, if there is such a thing: Powerhouse character actors in supporting roles (Alan Rickman and Emma Thompson as the dynamic cop/FBI agent duo) completely overshadow the capable efforts of younger colleagues meant to be the central characters (Gugino, Simon Baker, and Gil Bellows).

“…you can’t really dust for vomit…” [proceed at your own risk]

I generally either like or love David Spade’s work, but “Joe Dirt” (2001) is a total waste of time. If you like redneck humor, watch the same year’s “Say It Isn’t So” instead; it has an almost identical plot (an idiot searching for his parents), the same trailer park appeal, and is much more entertaining — perhaps because it doesn’t rely on one person but instead a strong cast, including Chris Klein, Heather Graham, and Sally Field. Spade is much better in his collaborations with yet another SNL grad, the late Chris Farley (“Tommy Boy,” 1995, and “Black Sheep,” 1996); his banter in “Joe Dirt” is kind of like a match against a tennis practice machine. Martin Lawrence’s “Black Knight” (2001) is a similar story; this slapstick/ghetto humor would-be comedy is just not funny. Worse yet, it’s thinly plotted around Lawrence’s character waking up in the 14th century after a — guess what — blow to the head. An accomplished comedian, Lawrence is bearable as an actor only when his antics are supported by actual acting, such as that of Will Smith and Tea Leoni in “Bad Boys” (1995, with a sequel coming out in 2003). Another cumbersome production is “Saving Silverman” (2001), where two friends try to prevent the third from marrying the wrong woman. This one definitively proves that “American Pie” star Jason Biggs just can’t act. The filmmakers apparently tried to side-step this problem by also casting Amanda Peet, Jack Black, and Steve Zahn, but even this talented trio couldn’t do much to improve the ridiculously repetitive script. This “just too dumb” quality is not helped by Neil Diamond’s cameo appearance; in fact, this is yet another in a string of the singer’s questionable and obviously financially driven choices (think back to his 1992 Christmas special… of Jewish origin).
“Summer Catch” (2001), a melodramatic rendition of yet another “underprivileged” youth’s (Freddy Prinze, Jr.) quest for the Big Leagues, might as well be titled “Summer Miss.” If anything, it serves as a platform for Jessica Biel to shed the good girl 7th Heaven image by parading around half-naked. The talents of Prinze and Matthew Lillard are totally wasted here. With another 2001 release, “Thir13en Ghosts,” Lillard’s success as an actor is becoming questionable; he is clearly not doing as well as one would expect based on his previous successes in the teen flick genre. Also starring Tony Shalhoub, F. Murray Abraham, and Shannon Elizabeth (half-naked again, God bless “American Pie”), “Thir13en Ghosts” is as close as the extraordinarily talented Lillard has come to a lead role since “SLC Punk!,” but this one is so badly written that it is more of a blemish on the fine actors’ careers than anything else. It does, however, have one plus: Dark Castle Entertainment (“House on Haunted Hill,” 1999) sure knows how to make haunted houses look fabulous; the studio is masterful in terms of creepy visuals, make-up, and special effects. (On a side note, is anyone else disturbed by the continuing trend of numbers instead of letters in movie titles? Clever this is not — anymore, that is, since the groundbreaking typography work of “Se7en,” 1995.)
“Murder by Numbers” (2002) is Sandra Bullock’s sad attempt to evade typecasting by playing an emotionally bankrupt cop working a series of murders. She has yet to convince audiences that she can handle a lead dramatic role. Her first attempt, “28 Days” (2000), also failed to achieve this goal, but this drama — set in a substance abuse clinic and co-starring Viggo Mortensen, Elizabeth Perkins, and Steve Buscemi — was a much better film overall. In addition to Bullock’s terribly lacking performance, the plot of “Murder by Numbers” is predictable and boring; the only noteworthy aspect of this film is its young stars, Ryan Gosling and Michael Pitt.
As to the worst of this bunch, the honors go to “Queen of the Damned” (2002) and “Bones” (2001). Anne Rice fans must be appalled at the poor cinematic adaptation of her literary genius and equally disappointed by this grossly inferior sequel to the smash 1994 hit, “Interview with the Vampire.” “Queen of the Damned” offers nothing but packaging; the late Aaliyah is stunningly exotic, and the film is beautifully art-directed, but there is nothing else there (except, perhaps, for the rare cinematic appearance of Lena Olin, who now spends most of her time on television’s Alias). “Bones” is, in essence, “The Haunting” (1999) in the ghetto, with Snoop Dogg in his debut — and quite possibly the last — attempt at the big screen. With a murdered gangster coming back for revenge years later, this story is as passé as they come, and even the wondrous creature that is Pam Greer can’t elevate this flick from the obscurity for which it is destined.

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